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When did suicide really come crashing down on you? For me, the closest it had come to me is the day I saw that my good friend Cory Hicks had ended his life. It was September 8, 2018 and I was at work. I got a call from a co-worker who was also good friends with Cory and asked if I had heard from Cory. Then proceeded to tell me what he knew. Cory had disappeared and the thought was he was heading up to Illinois to see his mom.
So I start calling all the folks I know, which isn’t many, but I wasn’t going to let him just go. I was scared for him. You see Cory was a fascinating man in my world. I was just the boring ol’ dude who got up did his job and never really thought much more of it. Yet one day at my work hauling sand to frack jobs there comes this rather large dude on a rather loud motorcycle and he is getting ready to head out too. It was him, and a close friend of his who had joined up to haul sand with everyone else at Sandstone.
As I got to know him through our driving and sitting at locations waiting to unload I got to know Cory very well and he was quick on harmless practical jokes. You never left your phone unlocked around him or he would post something embarrassing on your Facebook page. You know that type of stuff.
Last known photo of Cory Hicks
We talked a lot about what we wanted to do. Looking to the future and I guess I saw possibility while Cory only saw limits. That I don’t know just me speculating. But Cory wanted to try many different things and had grand schemes. He questioned if would it be possible to report the news with only a positive spin. He wanted to have a chauffeur business but with elite suvs and service. He wondered if that was possible. These types of conversations were common. One day he decided to move on and hopped out of that truck into another. Still talked to him but not as often. From time to time our paths would cross and those discussions would pick back up.
He Hopped around doing different trucking jobs till in 2016 he helped me land a job hauling groceries. Such a change of what I could do and he was there through all of the training and helped with the tough docking places he had to go to. Then around 6 months in he went to work at another place. I stayed for another 6 months or so and then I left. Cory was at Estes trucking and he had gotten out of the truck. He was doing good just bought a bunny. Yeah funny I know this huge boisterous guy and a bunny.
Life carried on till the 8th of Sept and I was Blowing up his phone trying to will him to answer. I didn’t sleep that night. Afraid that he had done something extreme. Started looking online and found a post from Sept 11. from The Courier & Press in Illinois.
I sort of felt like I had failed him. I still wonder if he was to pick up the phone through the night would he still be here? He may have been in jail but at least he would still be alive. He was a good man. Just for some reason he had a demon that wanted him and the demon won. Now all I have is the memories of his jokes and the energy he gave to those around him. It is interesting that when I go and look for information, his photo is now associated with suicide. True that’s how his life ended but did he really die of suicide or was he already dying when he gave up? I don’t know I am just rambling now.
I had talked about Cory on my Blog and this is where I started talking about Suicide. I talked about my friend Jake and his passing. We lose so many good men to whatever causes men to lose hope. This is why I see ;Even One Less as an important means of coming to understand why men do this. I want to see one less man keep his story. Have him be able to share why he thought it would be a good idea. Find a solution because they are there. We can find them with your help and with ;Even One Less we will stop these men from taking permanent solutions to temporary problems.